R & R

What is my role in the larger scheme of things? What is the task that fate has intended me to complete? What is the work I am expected to carry out as a soul this lifetime?

These questions have been plaguing me for some time. Stuck in a limbo, a vacuum, I stand on the paths that earlier were clear which now seem to have disappeared. (I would prefer to think that this is a temporary situation.)

On one level I am certain that I, as an organism born, I must have a role to play, however miniscule. But when I think of it, as one human being among 6 billion and odd on earth, among 60 zillion if I were to add the animals, birds, reptiles and insects and probably gazillions if I include the plant life, I wonder whether the Universe has any specific role for me to play at all! If I include the zillion universes that we may be part of, I lose my context totally. Even asking the question seems somehow silly!

Venky says he works because it’s the only thing to do to pass time between birth and death. My feeling of self-importance and delusional romanticism rejects such an arbitrary definition, and I would like a more reasoned out understanding of my role in the Universe, if not for anything else, at least to satisfy my misguided ego.

Maybe I can make the search for an answer itself a task. ‘Who am I and what am I here to do?’ can keep me busy for the rest of my life, until death overtakes me and makes nonsense out of my questions. And if I extend these questions to community and society, it can keep me and the rest of us busy forever!


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